Monday, September 10, 2007
This isn't a hate letter, Summer. After all, we've been together like Nike Airs and crisp T's. It's been an eventful few months, Summer. Not good, not great, but eventful.
You started with one of the worst NBA Finals series in history, with the San Antonio Spurs coming out on top, like they always do. (Summer, do you hate the world when you put the Spurs in your most popular series? They're good and all, but we would rather stand outside all afternoon during one of your blistering, 110 degree days then watch them bore out the planet.)
Then, to further punish me (and the rest of the city of Houston), you endure us with the most rain we've had in 65 years. Now, that was just cruel.
You provided the world (sports and other) with scandals that proved just how crazy this world we live in really is, including one of my favorite athletes effectively ethering his own career for the love of dogfighting, with the added bonus of his so-called friends and co-defendants ethering the rest of him to save their own asses. There was also the referee betting scandal that gave NBA fans even more reason to re-think their loyalties, Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, and Nicole Ritchie fucking up, and, to end your time with us off right, some more Brittney Spears fuckery. (More here.)
And, sadly, you ended The Sopranos. Though, with the series finale, you could have done a tad bit better than this.
But, Summer, you weren't all that bad. After all, you do harbor my birthday and all. You gave ignorant baseball writers and fans another reason to totally hate Barry Bonds. You brought the gold back to where it rightfully belongs. And you found time out of your busy schedule to resurrect the hopes and dreams of one of the NBA's greatest franchises.
And despite your obvious hatred for Houston sports, you finally showed some love to my Rockets, and even the Texans. (The Astros, not so much. But never mind them anyway.) You brought back an old friend, and introduced us to a couple new ones. And you finally gave the city of Houston quarterback worth cheering for. Of course, I had already turned my back on the Texans, thanks to what that bitch Spring did last year.
So, Summer, my beloved, since we're getting some time away, I wanted to praise you. Even though you deprive me of my addiction to basketball, you've improved over the years and gave us the Internet and all its lovely gifts. No longer do we have to rely on ESPN Classic and NBATV all day in anticipation for Winter. Your best invention yet, YouTube, is truly a present from God.
And you also give us the great game of football just as you're leaving, and we can't thank you enough. And we all long for you when school arrives in the Fall. NFL Madden's release should double as your Christmas. Hell, you were even the inspiration for one of the greatest Jay-Z songs of all time, which was the inspiration for this post. See how it all spins around.
So, I have to say goodbye to you Summer, while you play out the last few days of your stay. Next time I see you, hopefully we can talk about how the Titans suprised some AFC team in the playoffs, how A-Rod dominated in the World Series, and plans for a championship parade downtown in July. But, until then, I'm done for now, so one for now.
P.S. Please tell Winter and Spring to show the same love to my Rockets.